It ain't pretty

There are somethings in life that just suck. It sucks to feel like you are being led on. It sucks to lose someone you love. It sucks to feel like you are so close to finding someone to spend the rest of your forever with only to be left standing there all alone. It sucks to feel like all your friends are getting asked out right and left and you just sit in your apartment and watch netflix. It is a hard thing to feel like the unwanted one. It is hard to sit around and wait for something to happen. I hate to be the one to complain but let's be real, everyone complains. Is it so bad to want to be with someone? No, I don't want to be with just anyone. I like having my alone time and being independent but some days more than others it just isn't my cup of tea. I feel like I constantly am searching for the one and I just want it all to stop. Why can't guys get off their lazy butts and see what is right in front of them? Why would you just want a girl who is going to play games with your head? I honestly hate when guys complain about how girls are mean when in reality we just have to protect ourselves because GIRLS ARE EMOTIONAL. Get used to it and get over it. If we like you, we want to see you. We want to spend time with you. and for the love can you stop playing mind games? You say you love communication and it is so important but you can't even send someone a text back! You sit there and tell us we are beautiful and you love to cuddle with us, but is it all true or just another lie to make it so you don't have to spend another night alone because your "dream girl" stuck you in the friend zone? Don't leave me or anyone else on "the hook" because if you do, I will not stay there for a second. I promise you honesty is the best policy. You wanna call me crazy? I call it passionate. If i like someone, I am not going to screw them over. I can't be heartless because my heart is always on my sleeve. I know one day someone will fall madly in love with all the things that I can't stand about myself but until then wouldn't it be nice if we all could just accept people for who they are? If there is someone I have my eye on then I basically have tunnel vision. So what? I don't like going out with multiple people because my emotions can't take it! I'm an all or nothing kind of person. I may try too hard sometimes, but I would rather give it everything I have then regret not taking a chance. So to whoever out there is reading this and thinking I am crazy, welcome to the mind of a woman because I promise you I am NOT the only one who thinks like this. I just am bold enough to speak my mind. #endrant #thestruggleisreal